What remains of me
Does not belong to you
I breathe no prayers in your name
What remains of me
Does not seek you
Rest all of it is just the same
My songs never reached the sunset
It drowned in the waters before
My prayers never reached its Lord
They were swept away to some grey shore
You could not see my hope
I could not see your smile
You couldn’t love before
I couldn’t all the while
I couldn’t let you pass
You couldn’t fail the test
In the midst of push and pull
We killed the grieving nest
You never knew my name
I never knew your words
I spoke to silent walls
You sang to lonely birds.
Well written poem. Seems to have some sub-text.
ReplyDeleteThank You. Poetry can hardly survive without a subtext.. :)
DeleteThis one however is purely metaphysical.
Oh yeah. That's the way. Now this, is awesome.
ReplyDelete:) Thank you..
DeleteNow that's a sublime arrangement of words. The purity of your words belies the hurt depicted. Of course it is metaphysical. No doubt about that. You have successfully conveyed a sensation that's going to haunt your readers long after they left your poem. It surely will haunt me, in a good way.
ReplyDeleteTerrific composition of words.
N
You are very very kind Anupam and extremely generous! Thanks a million tons. Its a humble attempt. :)
DeleteLoved your poem. Wish you good luck with your writing.
ReplyDeleteThank you Abhra.. :)
DeleteOhh... beautifully written. Very deep and you have your way with words. :)
ReplyDelete:) hardly... but Thanks a ton!
DeleteBeautifully composed Rohu...everything was simply brilliant...the way it started, the way it end and also the way it was carried out... :D :D :D
ReplyDeleteWow, there's so much crowding and so much loneliness in those lines. I absolutely loved it. Sublime is a theme carried through after all.
ReplyDeleteComing back for more!!!
wow!
ReplyDelete