Nothing at all

Time slipped through her sweaty palms
And she slipped through her existence
Pleasing and laughing
Her demented self
Dragged itself in the motionless calms
She feared the fire, as it chased her
Every candle she lit, burnt her down
Sometimes slowly, sometimes at once
Her charred remains fell on the tired earth
And she rose again to walk
She lifted her hands and touched the humid air
It touched her back
And ran down her neck as a curious drop
To disappear in the melancholy of her skin
She laughed again
The wind tried to plait the whims of her hair
And the grass wept below her naked feet
She felt nothing and spoke much
Of care and promises
She sifted her heart through the sieves of hope
To find a morsel of feeling to feed upon
Hungrily she looked, starved and white
But alas! Everything she had devoured
To bring her back after she lay dead every time
Her ghost smiled and shrieked
She fell down on indifferent sands
the Sun in conversation with musing clouds
About a woman who is so dead yet not
The sands took pity at last
And hid her under their whispering prisms
Come they said, come back to where you belonged.
The candles melted away.

And it rained

I heard a laughter today

Loud, clear, ringing

Cutting through the air i breathe

It did not mock me as i thought it would

For my unearthly insides are marred with guilt

My dark side may be more of grey

If it pours for a while, the sky would be clear

What a shame, i love this grey so often

But only because it rains

Sitting by the side of a half blind sparrow

sheltering himself from the pour

It sat in quiet solitude

At envious peace with himself

Allowing me a little space

For which i was grateful

I tried to hold the string of water

And ended up with empty wet fist

The sparrow didn't move

Pensive and content

The earth was laughing loud

Washed from brown to a happy green

And its spirit seemed to be telling me

Be patient... wait

If there is a burning sun, there will always be rains

You cant do without either

That feeling, i am sure you feel it often too

When you are away from all that is near you

When you ponder about who you are

and why are you here

Were you born to somebody's child, sibling, friend, spouse

employee, relative, enemy

or were you born for yourself

or for this tiny microscopic world

Can you listen to the voice that calls you

from afar

Drowned in the clatter of love, hate and war

I can when it rains

When at some blessed moments

I become a nobody's nobody

And then seeps in a foreign sun

And my grey turns a shade light

Live my friend, even if its for a day

To make an existence possible.

Qne day in a life...

Today my ear met music that charmed it
Today my eyes met waters that becalmed it
Today my spirit met a soul that balmed it
Today my tongue met words that armed it
Today the rains that did not happen
Washed away some long lived fears
Today i smiled for a friend and said cheers
Today i left the book unread
Today i saw the sunrays spread
Today i lied, today i truthed
Today i died, today i lived.
Today life took me in its embrace with love
Today randomness delighted the dove...
Today i hold the dawns cool hands
and talk to dreams in rainbow sands...
:)

nothings...

The purpose i cannot see
why my fingers long to weep
the unsaid tales
when i think, there is nothing to feel
when i think, there is nothin to grieve
but when words touch my paper
they fall in love
i cannot write like you do
or like they did
but
as long as my pen writes
i know there is something i feel inside
and something wakes up the moment
i decide to embrace sweet slumber
it makes a promise
that i will still have the same heart i have tonight
and i will keep on loving
as i do...

Food for Heart

An empty glass lies in front of me..

So empty that it makes my heart heavy…

Surprised I am at the randomness of my thoughts.

This hour, my uncomplaining companion

Sits with me in the deafening quietness…

And when I am searching for the purpose of being alive

The wind gently whispers to my drowsy soul.

The bitterness of coffee still lingers on my tongue.

 I was seven when I had learnt to spell it.

In some strange sort of way, I had come to like it….

Without milk, without sugar, without company.

An open book beseeches me to read it,

but my eyes now behold  the breaking dawn.

And I am wondering, what am I wondering

Now, that the day has arrived.

I hope it is a better one for someone somewhere.

And here comes and sits this little blue bird

And sings me good morning in its heavenly notes

My soul smiles to my lips….

I bring her some water and a few grains of food

She acknowledges it most gracefully

Before I could check them, they come rolling out,

These funny things we call tears.

For reasons that words cannot put through.

I ask her to forgive me and my kind…

I hope she does, for she is not what I am.

I wish I could hold you to my heart

And tell you that I never meant harm

But then nothing I did to prevent it either

And now when I see you this close

I wonder, why, how, and when did i

So ruthlessly push you away

Forgive me my little love

For the vastness of your loving heart

Has dwarfed me.

Ashamed I am, but I love you…

I will until my last breath…

For today you gave me something

I never had, and I never knew..

She happily bids me adieu

I hope she comes to see me again

I now return to my day

After a long time not thinking

How loved I really am.

But rejoicing that today

I have one more soul to love.

For love nourishes the life within us.

And bears in us the fruit of hope…

That which will never die…