Sunday, April 24, 2011

for a beloved sis

I will never tell it you my little love, but I just realized that you were my first answered prayer. I still remember how passionately I had prayed for a sister, and when pa had come smiling into the waiting room and said, you have a little sister now... I still regret that I had misplaced my shoes, and therefore, I had to run and see you and come back... :(  but you were so beautiful, sleeping like a cherub in a nest... how I had loved ma that day.. for giving me the gift my heart had so truly yearned for, and now that you have blossomed into such a beautiful flower, I feel Incandescently happy to see you... your charming smiles, your humorous pinching sarcasms, your naughty giggles, your unbelievably logical arguments, your lovely eyes, your melodious voice, and that beautiful heart which you so smartly hide under that cloak of indifference, by Jove!! my kid, you are so charmingly unique and amazing, that i keep marveling... and every moment spent with you is nothing but worthwhile... when you lie on my arm every night and sing me songs in a nightingale's voice.. its hard to stop these tears. They bring me closer to heaven... i know my heart smiles when you smile at me, call me di or plant that lovely kiss on my cheek. How i love to listen to your dreams and little secrets which you share with such love and faith.. and then crack pointless jokes just to laugh with you... again i will never accept but i love it when you ask me to write, sing, read or cook for you and i hope you did like the cake today... such freak i am, baking at four in the morning just for fun!! :D I wouldn’t do it for anyone else... but for you it was no less than a little adventure... you can never know how much my heart grieves when i see tears in those eyes or when you chose a wrong direction... but i promise you bacchha, that while i am breathing i will never let you go astray... you are my gift, and in a sense my responsibility and yes no matter how much you dislike it, i am always worried for you... all i want for you, is happiness, love and fulfilled dreams. By heavens! you will be a stunning lawyer... and yes we will find a good looking man for you.. :D
You surprise me with the kind of patience and attention with which you listen to my hour long lectures and i am more than humbled for the immense respect and love that you bestow on me... your love touches my heart in its utmost depth... you truly are my twin soul, although with a complete makeover.. :) always be as genuine, honest and straightforward as you are... and now that my sparrow is ready to take off from her nest, so many emotions storm my mind... happiness, hope, fear... i pray that you be protected  from prying predators and unscrupulous elements... that you know what is right and what is wrong for you... that you soar through these skies and that you are always loved and admired... life is not easy my dear, but i would ask God to give me the maximum share of your pains and troubles... but not all...for i would also pray that you go through crucial trials in life whose lessons are priceless... these would polish you well... and i know you will make me and family immensely proud one day... i feel like i am Yeats, writing a prayer for his daughter... for the mother in me, only sees you as her daughter... :) i know i am getting all jasbati... but i am smiling while writing this so it doesn’t matter....and thank God you can’t read it my little enfant terrible!! :) truly in every sense the spice of my life...How badly i will miss you, i don’t even want to think about... but then this day was always in waiting... take care my love... u r way beyond special. and loved most sacredly.. and no matter when you need me, Didda will always be there... always... you cannot even imagine, how my heart swells with joy and pride, when i look at you and tell someone... That’s my Sister....  joy be with you... ;)

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