Musings..

हसरतों  की  कब्र  में , एक  रूह  दफन  हो  गयी ..

वोह  आग  को  लगा  गले , एक  आह  ओढ़े  सो  गयी ...

आंसुओं  से  आसमान  के , धुल  गयी  ज़मीन  तेरी ..

कि बादलों की  साजिशों  में , घुल  गयी  ज़मीन  तेरी ...

किस  फ़कीर  कि  मज़ार  पे , अब  चादरें  चधाऊँ  मैं ?

किस  शौख के  बाज़ार  में , दिलचस्पियाँ  जताऊँ  मैं ?

पुछा  जो  कल  कि रात  से , वोह  बोली  क्या  बताऊँ  मैं ?

क्यूँ  इस  सवेरे  के  आगे , फिर  आज  सर  झुकाऊँ  मैं ?

क्यूँ  आज  जलती  लौ  से  लड़  पड़ी  हैं  यह  हवाएं  फिर ?

क्यूँ  अब  दुआ   की  राह  देखती  हैं  यह  दवाएं  फिर ?

 भूले  हुए  गुनाहों  की , क्यूँ  मिल  रहीं  सजाएं  फिर ?

क्यूँ  हंस  रहीं  हैं  आज  रेगिस्तान  की  फिज़ाएं फिर ?

एक  आस  मेरी  थी  कभी , तनहाइयों  में  खो  गयी ,

एक  सांस  मेरी  थी  कभी , गवाहियों  में  खो  गयी ,

एक  रात  कि जो  बात  थी , कहानियों  में  खो  गयी ,

एक  अक्स  है , छुपाने  को , परछाइयों में  खो  गयी .

What shall

The silent stare of the the night

Winds waltzing around with dust

Spirits singing to earthly mates

Burning in haunted lust

A fire breathing its last

In the midst of mocking ashes

A song from the womb of whiskey

Into his numbness crashes

A frown upon a forehead

The scent of evening prayers

Driving away an evil

That often pulls the chairs

The lamps that light for nobody

But for the whistling man

His family sleeps in his quarters

All of them who can

The bareness of a page

I clad with weeping ink

What will become of it

After the darkness shall sink?

A tragedy to be alive?

Or some comedy to pass away

In the middle of loving and laughing

One maddening November or May.

The Dream

Let there be a day

When the world forgets

My existence humble

When i will not be known

By those who love me so well

And by those 

Who hate me to swell

When i will need no name

to be remembered or scorned

When memories will not haunt

The near empty mansions of life

When my tear would cease to matter

And my laugh cease to delight

When my words would not be cared for

And my pain would not be bright

I would sit in the company of wise blue deodars

And breathe the coolness of calm

Listen to the whispers of eager winds

And complains  of weeping waters

The moon would beseech me to not sleep

And keep him company in his quarters

Tell me how well he loved the sun 

And would keep her sheen in crystal jars

The ivory lover spoke all night

Swore his love was true

I asked him if she loved him too

He shook his head in silence

I am a rock, she is a star

I worship my Goddess from afar

She gives you warmth and rain

She is the source of your life beloved

While I play with salty waters 

And shine embracing her kindly light

You will not see my face when she is in sight

She is the center of ten worlds proclaimed

Who am i then, a piteous orb

But no regrets he gallantly claimed

Of my feelings i shall never boast

For the earth you sit on dear creature

Is what she and I love the most. 

I guard the daughter by the night

In the morning she lovingly rises

Mother of the beautiful child

Holding hands in cloudy guises.

And then i shall come again to play 

And sing the cherub to sleep

I think the kid loves me well

She resembles her mother in deep

And so till he spoke I listened with love

And then he beheld his glorious queen

Smiled at me and waved goodbye

Mother wrapped the child in a happy green.

I go back to sleep again

Until ma wakes me up.

The world comes back to me 

With the touch of the coffee cup...

The Dream of Dusk

Under the blanket of warm grey clouds
Lies a night grave and quiet
When half the world lies in the caverns of dreams
A few fettered souls roam on roads unknown
They sit in the company of aimless thoughts
Or lie in the lap of wasteland
Laughing at floudering humanity
Or lamenting its heartless cruelty
Holding the hand of darkness
They warmly welcome the blushing crimson sun
The ignorant world wakes up to another day
They lie awaiting the conspiring moon.

Food for Heart

An empty glass lies in front of me..

So empty that it makes my heart heavy…

Surprised I am at the randomness of my thoughts.

This hour, my uncomplaining companion

Sits with me in the deafening quietness…

And when I am searching for the purpose of being alive

The wind gently whispers to my drowsy soul.

The bitterness of coffee still lingers on my tongue.

 I was seven when I had learnt to spell it.

In some strange sort of way, I had come to like it….

Without milk, without sugar, without company.

An open book beseeches me to read it,

but my eyes now behold  the breaking dawn.

And I am wondering, what am I wondering

Now, that the day has arrived.

I hope it is a better one for someone somewhere.

And here comes and sits this little blue bird

And sings me good morning in its heavenly notes

My soul smiles to my lips….

I bring her some water and a few grains of food

She acknowledges it most gracefully

Before I could check them, they come rolling out,

These funny things we call tears.

For reasons that words cannot put through.

I ask her to forgive me and my kind…

I hope she does, for she is not what I am.

I wish I could hold you to my heart

And tell you that I never meant harm

But then nothing I did to prevent it either

And now when I see you this close

I wonder, why, how, and when did i

So ruthlessly push you away

Forgive me my little love

For the vastness of your loving heart

Has dwarfed me.

Ashamed I am, but I love you…

I will until my last breath…

For today you gave me something

I never had, and I never knew..

She happily bids me adieu

I hope she comes to see me again

I now return to my day

After a long time not thinking

How loved I really am.

But rejoicing that today

I have one more soul to love.

For love nourishes the life within us.

And bears in us the fruit of hope…

That which will never die…

Musings...

In the symphony of the night’s silent song

I have found solace, now lost for long

And when in my shallow I heart I ponder

My mind’s loneliness is nothing but wonder

And dread creeps into my weeping mind

Holding on to things I have long left behind

Show me the empty darkness, show me that blissful light.

I haven’t seen either, or weak is my sight

And when I breathe on  paper these words unseen

I sigh to muse what a mess I have been.

And when these young birds sing their ever delightful notes

On the velvet grass, I lay and lament the walls and forts

Freed from the bondage, let me walk alone

My spirit lies tied in this cage of flesh and bone.